Crowley

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale didn't quite know what to do with himself.

Ever since the night before, when he'd blinked away from Crowley - Crowley who had kissed him. He was confused, and he was having feelings, and he didn't know how to deal with any of them.

So of course he decided to read one of his favorite books.

He put a "CLOSED" sign on the bookshop door, and sat down with a misprinted bible and a cup of tea.

Comments

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale coughed when he took a drink. "Crowley! Why do you want to get me drunk!"

[sauntereddownward]

"Awwohhh, calm down. You're far too wound up, angel. I was trying to help you relax. Take the edge off."

He lifted his own glass to his lips and mumbled, "get that stick out of your arse."

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale glared at him. "I do not have anything in my arse."

[sauntereddownward]

Not yet, he thought. Loudly.

"Still, you're far too high strung. Take a drink, calm yourself down. And tell me what you're reading."

[theangelfell]

Inexplicably, Aziraphale settled in the chair and took a drink. "It's a misprinted Bible," he said. "I know you think it's silly."

[sauntereddownward]

"How in the world is it misprinted?" he asked.

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale held the Buggre Alle This Bible out to him. "Ezekiel, chapter forty-eight, verse five," he said.

[sauntereddownward]

Crowley put his hand up.

"I'm not holding that. Just read it to me," he said.

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale rolled his eyes, but he read anyway.

"And bye the border of Dan, fromme the east side to the west side, a portion for Afher.
3. And bye the border of Afhter, fromme the east side even untoe the west side, a portion for Naphtali.
4. And bye the border of Naphtali, from the east side untoe the west side, a portion for Manaffeh.
5. Buggre all this for a Larke. I amme sick to mye Hart of typefettinge. Master Biltonn if no Gentelmann, and Master Scagges noe more than a tighte fisted Southwarke Knobbefticke. I telle you, onne a daye laike thif Ennywone half an oz. of Sense should bee oute in the Sunneshain, ane nott Stucke here alle the liuelong daie inn thif mowldey olde By-Our-Lady Workefhoppe.
6. And bye the border of Ephraim, from the east fide even untoe the west fide, a portion for Reuben."

[sauntereddownward]

"HA!" Crowley exclaimed, then cackled madly. "And that's what you get from one of yours. Ours would have pissed off the job entirely."

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale arched an eyebrow. "I'm not so sure this was one of ours."

[sauntereddownward]

"Well if he's not one of ours and not one of yours he must be a pure untouched soul. Funny, we tried to corrupt as many writers as we could."

He took a sip.

"Never thought to go after the typesetters."

[theangelfell]

"Why would you?" Aziraphale said, and laughed. Relaxed a little. He could forget what had happened yesterday and just go back to enjoying Crowley's company. He even took up the teacup and took a sip without thinking.

[sauntereddownward]

Miraculously the cup was one again tea, but this time a piping hot chamomile and lavender with a bit of milk and sugar.

"Of course. Why would I?" he replied. "The thought wa always to go after the writers, you know. The ones with something to say."

[theangelfell]

"Well surely not the ones who wrote the Bible," Aziraphale said, and then frowned at his own statement. "Well maybe Leviticus."

[sauntereddownward]

"You'd be shocked, angel. More than just Leviticus," he replied. "Though, to be fair, mostly old testament. Once He came along things changed dramatically downstairs."

[theangelfell]

"Yes, well, the New Testament is a bit gentler, thanks to his influence," Aziraphale said.

He wasn't going to defend all of God's decisions. He hated when Crowley brought up the Flood.

[sauntereddownward]

"Raw deal, he got. If you ask me," Crowley replied thoughtfully. "But he was a good boy. Gave up on that one when I met him. No point."

[theangelfell]

"Yes," Azirpahale said, a bit sadly. "Yes, that's all very true." Pause. "So Crowley, did you just come by to, ah, to say hello?"

[sauntereddownward]

"Why else would I possibly come by, angel?" Crowley asked. "I'm on holiday. A much deserved one at that. And so are you. Say! Why don't we take a trip? Imagine it...a beach, fruity little drinks, no one demanding any results. Come onnn."

[theangelfell]

Aziraphale looked at him for a moment. "I'm having difficulty imagining you on a beach," he said. "I think you'd look a bit out of place."

[sauntereddownward]

"Everyone wears sunglasses on the beach," he countered. The rest of his ensemble may stick out, though, he had to agree.

[theangelfell]

"But I do rather like the idea of drinks with little umbrellas in them." Aziraphale conceded.

[sauntereddownward]

"Now that's the spirit," the demon replied, slapping his knee. "No time like the present. Come on."

[theangelfell]

"Do I need to pack?" asked Aziraphale. "I should probably avoid drawing attention to myself by doing minor miracles like conjuring up... I don't know, a sun hat?"